6:00 am - Roll over and shut off alarm. Wake up hubby. Kiss him and roll over, close eyes, and go back to sleep.

9:00 am - Yawn, stretch, sit on side of bed and slip feet into pretty pink fluffy slippers. Tie on silk robe over filmy negligee.

9:15 am - Ring bell for maid service. Maid arrives with a tray filled with: a glass of orange juice, a cream cheese filled danish, a cup of Earl Grey breakfast tea, and the morning newspaper.

10:00 am - Ring bell for maid. Maid removes tray.

10:15 am - Take bubble bath.

11:00 am - Dress in designer jeans and silk blouse. Keep cute pink slipper on feet. Sit at computer and begin working on Chapter Ten of current manuscript. Crank out ten pages.

1:00 pm - Ring bell for maid. Maid arrives with lunch. A large salad with grilled chicken, fresh seedless green grapes, a glass of iced tea with lemon wedges.

1:05 pm - Pick up telephone and call crit partner while eating lunch. Learn she loved every single word of the last chapter.

1:30 pm - Ring for maid to clear lunch paraphenalia.

1:45 pm - Go back to manuscript. Crank out fifty pages.

4:30 pm - Shut down computer and take another bubble bath.5:15 pm - Dress in slinky black cocktail dress.

6:00 pm - Hubby arrives. Kisses me goodbye while I leave with Ryan Seacrest to watch the American Idol competition.

midnight - Slip into bed and make sure alarm is set for hubby. Good night.

YEAH RIGHT!!!

In reality:

5:00 am - Wake hubby and roll over for another 45 minutes of sleep.

5:45 am - Hubby kisses me goodby. Get up and stagger to shower.

6:00 am - Wrap hair in towel and head to the kitchen. Fix a bowl of cold mini wheats.6:15 am - Search refrigerator for lunch makings. Pack lunch.

6:30 am - Scrounge through closet for outfit to wear to work. Hmm, is it going to be warm or cold today. Never know whether the furnace or air conditioning will be running at the office.

6:45 am - Brush teeth. Slather on beauty creams. They don't work.

7:00 am - Dry and style hair.

7:15 am - Add makeup. Still no help.

7:30 am - Set security alarm, lock door and drive to work.

8:03 am - Clock in.

8:05 am - Put up with stupid people and boss's demands.

5:00 pm - Clock out and begin to worry whether I thawed any meat for dinner.

5:30 pm - Arrive home to find I didn't thaw anything out for dinner. Go to bedroom to change clothes and find hubby snoring on bed.

5:40 pm - Check emails. Answer pertinent ones.

6:00 pm - Listen to hubby tell me about his day. Head to kitchen to thaw meat in microwave.

6:15 pm - Head back to computer while ground chuck patties are cooking on the stove.

6:25 pm - Listen to shrill alarm and woman's voice saying "Fire, Fire." Rush to the kitchen and take the burning meat to the deck. Turn on the exhaust fan. Ask hubby how to shut off the alarm. Hubby too busy playing hand held solitaire while sitting on the bathroom throne to help. Cats look at me with hatred in their eyes. I turn on the ceiling fans and eventually the noise stops.

6:30 pm - Try to salvage some of the meat for dinner.

6:45 pm - Eat and converse with hubby about what we'll watch on television.

7:00 pm - Pick up the paper and become engaged in one of the articles while hubby cleans the table and loads the dishwasher (see, there was a reason I was pretending to be engrossed in the daily news). No dummy here!

7:15 pm - Go back to computer. Check emails which have been duplicating, triplicating, in all loops! Delete, delete, delete.

7:30 pm - Turn on Millionaire. Watch stupid guy lose $250,000. Watch girl who wants to look like Julia Roberts but doesn't quite make the grade.

8:00 pm - Watch Donnie Osmond and some dumb Great American Dream thing.

9:00 pm - Go downstairs and jump on elliptical exerciser and watch American Idol results with hubby.

9:30 pm - Come upstairs and go back to computer. Realize I have to post a blog interview on my personal blog. Get busy on that.

10:15 pm - Begin working on blog for Sweeter Romantic Notions on The Author's Life.

10:45 pm - Finish and realize...no writing accomplished today.