Thursday, July 09, 2009

What I Learned From My Mother...

...in the last 30 days. Warning - Not recommended for hypochondriacs! Please read with a sense of humor!


1. Never lift a sofa while your husband works on the sofa legs. Causes total destruction of leg muscles--FOREVER!

2. Never take an antibiotic. Causes your system to split in half. One half will be healthy, the other will have serious defects--FOREVER!!

3. Never use a piece of exercise equipment that has moving bars for the arms. Causes a severe outbreak of Shingles! -- ALWAYS!!

4. Never take an osteoporosis medication. Causes your bones to turn black--FOREVER!!!

5. Never take a generic antacid tablet. Causes your bowels to become defective--FOREVER!!!!

This is how my mother has reached the age of 85 with all these conditions. I haven't yet learned what caused her heart valve to malfunction. When I do, I will add it to the list of warnings.

Thanks for stopping by!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

What does eating dessert before bed cause again...ear aches---ROFL I needed the laugh tonight :)
Julie